Faith and Doubt

I wrote this in response to someone that was struggling spiritually.

Personally speaking, I "feel ya bro". I've had pretty much unshakeable faith since I was 20, or so I thought. I have never, since my awakening, once doubted the reality of God, the efficacy of His wisdom, or the surety of his love but, as the scripture teaches: the fining pot for silver, the furnace for gold but the Lord tries the heart of men. Experience has taught me that when the Father tests you, he'll bring you to breaking point. But if you can suffer it, out of the destruction comes resurrection and renewal.

I remember breaking down one night, after years of struggling with a personal issue, bawling my eyes out and, for the first time in my life, I really questioned the Father's love. I was shocked at myself and more than a little disgusted with my childishness and weakness.
Eventually, I realised that walking in this veil of tears is no easy task. Walking by faith, faith in the inevitable victory of truth, beauty and goodness, of faith in righteousness, mercy, tolerance, and forgiveness in a world that seems so terminally afflicted with corruption, is no mean feat.

I found it hard to believe that one could know God and life could still be so hard! For me, the contemplation of the Father and divine realities had always been a font of strength. However, years of bitter experience had made me weak; I guess. Or maybe I was just a naive "fair weather faith-er", it's 'easy' believe when things are going your way but it is challenging when everything you touch turns to shit.

I have learned to charge up most of my pain and heartache to my twisted vision of life and my limited understanding of reality and abandoned the blasphemous notion that the God of Love was indulging in His masochistic inclinations. As Paul said, "we perceive as through a glass, darkly". As a woman in the pain of childbirth reaches out for comfort, so when the soul is tried do we reach for the consolation of the Almighty. Indeed, how easy are our prayers when they are not carrying the weight of the world and, oh, how fervent when we must endure trials?

As I pondered the seeming injustices of life, my mind turned to the Son of Man and I realised that even Jesus wept. That, to me, is one of his unnoticed miracles - he wept: "he was in all points afflicted like as we are" but nothing, no suffering, no injustice, no cruelty could cause him to surrender his faith in the goodness and wisdom of the Father's way.

He was kind to the unkind, even with the unworthy. He was gentle, tolerant and forgiving even with the cruel, intolerant, and vengeful. His faith in righteousness and goodness was invincible and in this absolute faith he had the "peace that surpasses all understanding". The world laughed at him and called him a fool but he commended his soul to His Father's judgment. They heaped scorn on his ideals but his response was to pray for them.

Following Jesus is not a path of ease, it's a sure pathway to struggle but in these he walks with us; indeed, he leads the way.

Bruce Lee once taught, "don't pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." Scripture teaches that the worst affliction is never to have been afflicted. While the world has no respect for one that has never experienced difficulties. The only people we admire are those that have overcome great trials and yet still remain sweet.

Please, I call you to faith! Don't allow momentary weakness to dupe you into parting with all the dignity and respect you have acquired over the years, which you have so successfully forged out of your firey struggles with the perplexing delusions born of our material existence.

Victory is yours by faith and grace, and not by any great effort on your part. The Father and your unseen angelic brethren fight for you with a passion and means that are beyond your imagining. God is good to heal the broken hearted. Doubt not, believe only. Have faith. You will overcome.

My apologies if this is too preachy.
Life is hard. The guy on the Cross knows that, but even that injustice could not dull the Master's love of mercy or his willingness to reach out to those in need. He would never allowed the injustices he suffered to serve as an excuse to visit injustice upon others. He was a breaker of chains! He invites us to follow him. He invites us into the dignity of divine sonship, thereafter will all things needful be added.

'Be of good cheer; I have overcome the world!' Jn. 16:33

'Be of good cheer; I have overcome the world!' Jn. 16:33

Economically speaking, the West occupies a prosperous First World state. However, spiritually speaking, it languishes in Third World squalor. The spiritual poverty of the West, more specifically western Christendom, is at the root of much of the worlds suffering. The challenge lies then not so much in the fact that the West dominates the world's purse as in the fact that her children are still charmed by the lure of 'shiny things,' the pursuit of materialistic goals, to the exclusion of other, more noble aspirations eg.: the riches inherent in actualising the divine self. Its children are, in real terms, still quite immature. And so it is that, 'Only when man has become sufficiently disillusioned by the sorrowful disappointments attendant upon the foolish and deceptive pursuits of selfishness, and subsequent to the discovery of the barrenness of formalized religion, will he be disposed to turn wholeheartedly to the gospel of the kingdom, the religion of Jesus of Nazareth.'ⁱ

True poverty is not simply a case of empty pockets but a heart empty of spiritual ideals, values, dreams and vision, a life bereft of values, meaning and purpose.

The Christian scriptures teaches 'out of the heart come the issues of life, murder, theft, adultery' Mat. 15:19 or 'as a man thinketh in his heart so is he' Prov. 23:7. The social and cultural realities of this world are reflections of our inner realities. Culture, in all its multitudinous hues – dark or delightful, is simply the shadow cast by the human heart. Consequently, all lasting transformation must occur on an inner level and all such transformations are a matter of personal attainment, personal growth – spiritual growth. Any effort not specifically focused on facilitating personal growth, spiritual regeneration and inner transformation, is an effort focused on the effect and not the cause of our social ills; it is to attack the branch yet leave the root untouchedⁱⁱ. It was for this reason that Jesus enjoined his followers to pray that God 'create in me a clean heart.' As a result of these insights it can be seen that the first goal of any transformational effort should begin with education, spiritual education - education on ideals and idealism, and the nobility of service.

The ills that plague the nations of the Third World will never be solved with mere money. Were we to hand over a trillion dollars to uneducated peoples, the money would be squandered as a direct result of the fact that their cultural experience would unlikely have furnished them with the intellectual tools required to manage such a resource nor would they likely have acquired the skills of personal restraint and self-discipline necessary to manage such wealth. Merely throwing money at a problem, without adequate vision and support, would not only be of no practical use, it would undoubtedly make things worse. It might be wise to make note that though the West presently dominates this wealth it certainly has a ways to go in the wise and magnanimous management of it.

Challenging the oppressive structures of this world, while significant, is not the 'final solution' to the ills that assail us. Utopian civil structures demand first an ideal type of citizen; only thereafter may such illuminated individuals safely employ the civil structures and social institutions that govern such a society. Unless the lives and the action/decisions of the citizens of any hypothesised Utopian state are founded upon some transcendent Ideal then the structures are of no import. Corruption is a cancer to any system but it begins in the human heart. Consequently, perfect social systems without similarly perfection oriented individuals are doomed. Changing the system, without also inculcating the ideals of perfection within the cultural experience of that society's same citizens would be akin to putting a plaster on a bomb. Such social shortsightedness can only lead to tragedy on an epic scale. This is the insight alluded to within Jesus' parable of the Foolish Builders, Matthew 7:24-27. Without sound foundations, no project can stand the test of time. Our greatest foe is never the cultural milieu and structures into which we are born but the evil tendencies that ever spring from the soil of the imperfect corrupt human heart.

Similar views have been expressed by Daniel G. Groody, in an essay of his to be found in the journal Theological Studies, Vol. 62, No. 2., 2008; 'Globalizing solidarity: Christian anthropology and the challenge of human liberation.' He notes that 'to argue in favor of the strengths of the free market and material prosperity without reference to the weaknesses of human nature is to court moral and social disaster because it unravels the bonds that unite us as a human family.'ⁱⁱⁱ Pointing out that:

'Without an adequate vision of human life, it is easy to lose sight of our interconnection with each other and become vulnerable to an inner slavery that not only ignores human need but even rewards human greed. Structural reform is certainly needed, but politics and economics alone are insufficient to bring about the renewal and reordering of society. Nor can they map out the contours of a liberating human anthropology. Fundamental structural reform must be accompanied by a more fundamental inner change that originates in the human heart.^iv

While the value of the observations made by Liberation Theologies that 'many of the problems and disorders of the modern world... have their roots in structural and systemic issues that create and perpetuate global injustices,'^v cannot be discounted, Groody is concerned that the deeper issues at hand have gone relatively unexplored. Pointing out that 'these disorders on a more fundamental level are related to what happens within people.'^vi Stressing that, 'Our inability to deliver ourselves from inner discord not only contributes to global disorder but also distorts our understanding of how we come to realize our identity as human beings. This problem, at root, is not simply a political, economic, or social one but a spiritual one.' ^vii

Thus can we more clearly appreciate the depth of insight implicit in the teachings of Jesus. When he declares, 'the kingdom is within' – it wasn't simply a figurative statement. By giving preeminence to inner realities, he was laying emphasis on the fact that it is our hopes and dreams or lack of them, our passions and ambitions idealistic or craven, above all – our loving devotion to one another or its absence, that shapes our realities; while circumstances merely offer the context for their extemporisation.

'Fear not little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.' Luke 12:32

The radical nature of the Gospel Jesus lived and died preaching, is – to a degree – eclipsed by the tremendous social transformations that have been realised in His name since last he walked the earth. His prayer was always that all his followers, both present and to come, should be one – that they enjoy the same unity and communion that he shares with the Father among each other and with the Father, Jn 17: 20 - 22 . This facet of his teachings was taken up by Paul in Galatians 3:28 when he declared that: 'There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.' This teaching is implicitly opposed to any forms of oppression, any form of inequality, and challenges his followers to establish a radical equality, among one another and throughout the world. However, it should be borne in mind that the Master understood the delusion of 'equity' for he pointed out that 'the poor ye shall always have with ye.'

It should be realised that the prayer's Jesus uttered have a formative influence on this world and have not gone unanswered. In the eyes of the Eternal Father the unity for which His Son so ardently prayed, and died to establish, has already been granted and so already 'IS', at least in terms of the experiential consciousness of Deity. We, however, occupy a temporal frame of reference and therefore consciously experience it as a relatively endless series of transformations. Consequently, those of us that strive to bring about the unity of the world and that endeavour to vanquish oppression KNOW that the long sought after day will come. We know that the days of darkness and struggle are numbered and can draw succor from that; while concurrently strength can drawn from the truth that every effort, weak or strong, every success or failure, brings the day of victory over oppressive forms that bit closer.

It was during that fateful dialogue with Peter that Jesus made another instructive statement. Having finally led his apostle's to the point where they were now capable of recognising his true identity, he then said that he would commit to their keeping the 'keys of the kingdom'. Thereby establishing the Christian community as an instrument of G*d on earth. It is their G*d given right to organise themselves as they see fit, and according to purposes envisioned by themselves, that is perhaps their greatest strength. It is this 'spirit led' community that is thus endowed with the necessary wisdom, personal fortitude, and devoted commitment to kin-dom values that is destined to bring the world into balance.

This community can, has, and will continue to grow and nothing can stop it, not 'all the forces of evil' nor 'the hosts of sin'.

From this study it should be plain that the concept of kingdom as taught by Jesus sought to co-ordinate many dynamic realities. While it is significant that many of the metaphors that Jesus used to exemplify the nature of the kingdom shared a common element, namely 'growth', it should be pointed out that the multifaceted nature of the expositions of Jesus regarding this subject served to highlight the many varying dimensions of kingdom, thus offsetting any inclination to limit conceptual range – while at the same time facilitating the elucidation of some of the more instructive elements. However, the repeated references to 'growth' indicates that Jesus envisioned the kin-dom growing, much as a seed will through the seasons, until the time of the harvest. Harvest, in the context outlined in this essay, can be nothing other than the day referenced in the words uttered by the prophets Jeremiah and Isaiah, 'and they shall teach no more every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the LORD: for they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the greatest of them, saith the LORD. Jer. 31: 34. "And they shall beat their swords into plowshares, and their spears into pruning hooks: nations shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war any more." Is. 2:4

Jesus was introducing humanity to eternity and to the means of engaging with it in time, as has been established by the Source of Time and Eternity, Deity, i.e.: the will of God, the mechanism through which the children of time find their way into the presence of the Eternal and the means whereby the Eternal can both commune with and positively guide the children of time. It was by means of commitment to the doing of God's will that Jesus was empowered to 'overcome the world' and thus if his followers similarly wish to 'overcome the world' then to them Jesus has only one thing to say:

If you dare to believe in me and wholeheartedly proceed to follow after me, you shall most certainly by so doing enter upon the sure pathway to trouble. I do not promise to deliver you from the waters of adversity, but I do promise to go with you through all of them.^viii

i The Urantia Book 195:9.7

iiThis idea is found as theme within the works of the author James Allen, undoubtedly among many others. Three titles reflecting this are 'As a man thinketh', 'The Byways of Blessedness' and 'Above Life's Turmoils'. All these works can be downloaded freely from The James Allen Free Library.

http://james-allen.in1woord.nl/

iii Groody, Daniel G.; 'Globalizing solidarity: Christian anthropology and the challenge of human

liberation. Theological Studies, Vol. 62, No. 2., Section: Pg. 250(19) 2008

ivOp. cit.

vOp. cit.

viOp. cit.

viiOp. cit.

viii The Urantia Book, The Urantia Foundation, 1955. [159:3.13]

When a man loves a woman

Of late I’ve been engaging with a lot of critiques of modern, or post modern, feminism and it’s been enlightening – curiously coincidental with a lot of insights I’ve gleaned over the years. I was born in the early 70’s and was there for the early days of the media’s push for equality between the races and gender. It seemed like the right thing. People should not be victimised for the colour of their skin or their gender, only an insane person could think otherwise. I’ll never forget the words of Martin Luther King Jr, wherein he said that he had a dream of a nation where one day his children ‘would not be judged by the colour of their skin, but by the content of their character.’ I’ll never forget those words. They resonated so strongly with my soul that I pledged there and then to never judge any person by anything other than their ‘fruits’ – the content of their character.

But over the years the stated aim of this drive for equality has morphed beyond all recognition. Indeed, it would seem that in fighting monsters, it has become a monster. It seems like ‘equality for all’ has become a sort of unquestionable orthodoxy the very questioning of which evokes paroxysms of heretical outrage reminiscent of the bloody days of the (Un)Holy Inquisition. It seems that the idea has become so narrowly defined, and so utterly incapable of nuance, as to be, not merely redundant, but actually harmful to the great gains this drive has established. Such that it is now poised to drag us into a culture worse than any has yet existed in the past. This is disconcerting, to say the least.

Recently, I was making dinner for my girls and, as I was peeling the potatoes, ‘When a Man love a Woman’ by Percy Sledge played over my speakers and the imagery and lyrics danced in my mind and spoke deeply to me about the insanity of the age and alluded to the cure.

I thought about the love of which this man sang. I thought about my two little girls and how I hope that, when they grow to be women, they find someone that loves them so and that they love them every bit as much. Percy sang of the joys and ecstasy of finding ‘the one’ and the hell and horror that ever attends upon the realisation that you have fallen for the ‘wrong one’. I thought about the amazing devotion of the lover for the beloved. I considered how I have found such love and know other men and women that have been so blessed and try as I might, I could see no patriarchy in that relationship.

I have learned over the years that true love wants only to serve but fear needs control. Love inspires the urge to serve but fear inspires the craving to dominate. The service born of love is voluntarily bestowed upon the beloved. Technically, my two daughters are uncaring and ever demanding tyrants. If they are awake, I must be awake. If they are hungry, I must get them food. Technically, they have all the power. My life is no longer my own. My life is theirs and it is to be exercised for their good, regardless of my personal desires or wants. Does that mean that I live in a Matriarchy?

Men and women have loved one another genuinely, truly, madly, deeply for aeons and between sincere lovers there is no urge to dominate only to serve – even to freely and gladly die for the enhancement of their welfare. The relationship that exists between sincere lovers cannot be sullied by claims of power and dominance, such things are anathema to true love. However, to those that do not [or cannot know] know such love – there is only power and urge to dominate.

Percy said, ‘Loving’ eyes can never see’ and these words carry much wisdom. Love is a lens that pierces through the surface and perceives the core, the treasure hidden in the heart of the beloved. A person in love sees things in the beloved to which everyone else may be blind and often causes them to wonder ‘what the heck does she seen in him?’ or vice versa. In an ideal situation this works well but when one falls for a monster, the image crafted by your brain is censored so profoundly that all you can see are the positive elements and virtually nothing of the negative. You see the good ‘in potential’ but they never manifest it. You may wait patiently for the good to emerge but it never does. It chokes and dies in their heart and you wait and suffer, wait and suffer – until you can suffer no more.

On the other hand, HATE – the shadow of fear – is likewise a filter, only hate removes all that is good and focuses solely on the negative qualities. Interestingly, neuroscience has taught us much on how the brain filters data depending on particular attitudes, biases, and situations.

These reflections reminded me of the Master’s insistence that we approach all from an attitude and perspective of sincere love – even towards our oppressors, in fact especially towards our oppressors. Life has taught me that things conceived in anger cannot prosper, while all those things conceived in love cannot fail. It is, then, the better part of wisdom to endeavour always to respond with love towards all things, good or evil, lest we unthinkingly multiply the evil and darkness in the world.

I am therefore led to conclude that the primary drive that underpins the hateful attitude that is lorded over all as a virtue by 2^nd or 3^rd Wave Feminists is rooted in fear and that all their outrage is nothing more than ceaseless manipulation, a macroscopic cultural expression of the loveless narcissist who craves power and control. It seems that society is [at least in the West] like a pair of defunct lovers. One is sincere and adoring but the other interprets everything as a power play, it projects onto every one and every thing its own sickness – being utterly unable to conceive of the selfless love which lives only to serve.

Signs and Wonders

“Humans, they’re always lookin’ for signs, wonders, and miracles. As if turning sunbeams into wine using a grape wasn’t miracle enough.” Paraphrasing Terry Pratchett


When I reflect on Terry Pratchett’s wit I realise that like the fish in the ocean are completely unaware of the water wherein they live, move, and have their being, we too are blind to the great sea of cosmic miracles wherein we live, move, and have our being. All too often it is not until something tragic occurs, when the rug of our world is pulled out from under us - like a fish getting pulled from the water, that we are compelled to open our eyes and awaken to the world around us. It was not for nothing that the Master taught ‘many will not enter the Kingdom except by much tribulation’.

A friend once said, “You never truly know your own country until you leave it.” and it is amusing that you never know that you never know. Spiritual experiences are journeys to alternate realities in which you leave what was familiar far behind and embark upon a journey of sublime discovery. Such experiences precipitate huge changes or, put more precisely, huge corrections to our understanding of reality. 

In such moments an entirely new awareness of and appreciation for the things around us and our place in the universe is born. Our ‘eyes are opened’, we are ‘born again’ – ‘born from above’, stirred awake from our long slumber.

Over and over we see this metaphor employed to communicate the realisation of something marvellous, a gospel: that something greater than we can imagine lies at the heart of creation. This reality reaches beyond the furthest horizons of our imagination all the way down into the hidden deeps of our soul and on. In such moments we discover our very existence is a miracle, wrapped in mystery, and crowned from beginning to end in wonders.

The sages, seers, prophets, and spiritual teachers, across all the ages proclaim: ‘the kingdom of heaven is within you,’ ‘fear not, believe only. It is the Father’s good pleasure to give you the Kingdom,’ ‘the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand, even now is!’

Out of this abundant joy, ever welling up in the soul, springs forth the energy to transform ourselves and all Creation.

People keep looking for signs, wonders, and miracles, all the while failing to realise that they are a sign, a wonder, a miracle.

Heavenly Things

In John 3:12 we read these intriguing lines: “I have told you of earthly things and you have not believed; how much more so would you not believe were I to tell you of heavenly things?” This sentence teaches us much about the Master’s mission on earth. His mission can be summed up into three key revelations. First, was his revelation of the Father: he showed us what God is like when he portrayed the God of boundless love, limitless mercy, and endless devotion – declaring that ‘you that have seen me have seen God.’ Second, he taught us that we are the children of the God he came to reveal. And thirdly, he taught us how the children of God live and conduct their lives: “Love one another as I have loved you.”

It is hard to imagine what must have been going through the mind of Jesus when he was deciding on the portrayal of the Father he would make. We do know, however, that he went with the conservative option. We know this because at key points in his life - when faced with unbearably difficult decisions, when he was torn utterly between his longing to help his fellow man and his aspiration to abide in all things by his Father’s Will but couldn’t decided either way yea or nay, he retreated into the Father’s Will and in pretty much every single case the Father decided YEA! Jesus chose to portray the Father as solemn and devoted. I’m sure he knew his audience well and figured that this portrayal would work best, even if it wasn’t 100% replete. Over and over again in the life of Jesus the exuberant nature of the Father would spill out over the image Jesus was crafting in his life and teachings and make considerable trouble for him.

He was, no doubt, bursting to reveal so much more but couldn’t. He knew the limits of his people and therefore wisely restrained himself in his life and teachings. In restricting his revelations he even admonished his followers and the teachers of his gospel to let their light ‘so shine’ Matt. 5:16 such that their lives would effectively illuminate and not blind their fellows…but even at that, he told his closest friends: “I have yet many things to teach you, but you could not bear them now.” John 16:12. Jesus craved to teach his followers so much more but they simply could not bear it. It would have been utterly pointless to offer teachings that would have been beyond their ability to understand. So, he must have decided to leave those revelations for another day; a day when the gospel would have spread over all the earth and such teachings might have great chance of being accepted.

And so we return to the first line of this article: “I have told you of earthly things and you have not believed; how much more so would you not believe were I to tell you of heavenly things?” John 3:12

The life and teachings of Jesus served one great purpose: To make a revelation of God to man. In doing this another revelation was effected, the revelation of the ideal Man to the Father. He offered very little teaching on Heavenly things. There was much that was implied or suggested but almost no clear cut and distinct revelations with regard to Heavenly things. No doubt there was wisdom in this decision, people would barely believe him on simple and straight forward matters – even going so far as to murder him for his teachings. Over-revelation would have alienated him entirely from even his audience and he would have vanished from the history books as just another quack.

Would it be beyond the realms of possibility that even as the Son of Man came to reveal the nature and character of the Father that another revelation would eventually follow which might do two things: clarify the life and teachings of the Master and provide a revelation of Heavenly things? I’m sure many today would recognise that the gospel has been subject to a chain of Chinese Whispers two thousand years long and could do with some authoritative correction of the signal. I’m also fairly certain that a great many would be intrigued to learn of Heavenly things. I imagine that whereas in the past people refused his gospel message they would be more inclined to receive it today. The trick today would be getting passed their prejudice with regard to Heavenly things.

What if I told you that this revelation has occurred and is freely available to everyone in the world? Would you dare to check it out? Would you dare to believe this revelation? Or would you, like the spiritually blind souls of old, declare such teachings to be ‘madness’?

If you’d like to know more, click here

Whom do you serve?

We are all slaves but we are free to choose our master. The wise prostrate themselves before LOVE and achieve, thereby, their greatest liberty. Fools prostrate themselves before everything but Love and become mired in the wretchedness of their idols. LOVE is the substance of liberty; liberty is the form of Love. Insofar as you serve any master but LOVE you are a slave indeed.

Nihilist Nirvana

Hell is the belief that suffering and death are the only truths. Oblivion, then, is the Nihilist vision of Nirvana. How strange and macabre that their worship of death and suffering transforms the psychotic and pathological nihilist into an instrument of death and suffering. What is it that compels their blood sacrifice? Why do they seek to pave their way into nothingness with blood? To what god are they rendering their sacrifice? How easy it seems to them to smash the chains of being that anchor them to the dark fiction that they believe to be reality.

In their grave spiritual blindness they cannot perceive that life is greater than death! They appear not to comprehend that Death is an instrument of Life, it is a derived phenomenon – a shadow cast by Life but Life is the true substance. Life comes from Life and, in the last analysis, Life emerges ultimately from the Eternal.

The children of the Life Eternal are no strangers to death and suffering but they recognise truths far greater: the truths of growth, the ecstasy of worship, and the joy of service. For such salvation is not to be found by fleeing from life but by engaging with it and living to the fullness of one’s capacity.